Sunday, November 29, 2009

"...Is this the way it's really going down..."

Today's post is a guest post by my favorite person, Fashionista0921.

Fashionista, whether she realizes it or not, is a such a feminist in how she has dealt with everything these past months. She turned inward. She became introspective. And she focused on herself instead of turning into one of those stark, raving mad "women scorned" that society wants and expects every woman to become after a breakup. For this, I bestow upon her an honorary doctorate in Feminist Theory from PT University. :-)

Enjoy!

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I recent article over at the New York Times over here got me thinking... to Facebook or not to Facebook?!


About 9 or so months ago, you all know by now that my person and I took a break. We had known each other for over two years and were officially dating for a year and seven months. Times got a bit tough and we decided to take a break, a break I thought I knew would end with us back together. But that didn't happen. While on Facebook one day, I discovered he was in a new relationship, which tore my soul and heart to pieces. How could the person I thought I wanted to spend forever with do this to me? Did the really happen to me?

As you from my previous posting on PT, this was one of the hardest and most rewarding times of my life. As much as I think no one should go through the feelings of heart break and self doubt as I went though, it really made me realize alot of things about myself. Through it all, I discovered how strong and amazing I am. I know now what I wish I would have realized then. Things aren't going to work out with this past relationship, but I now know what I want and what I diserve in a partner. I'm im terrified, excited, and freaked-out as hell to start dating again. But I'm mostly excited to see what's in store for me.

This all beings me to the question- To Facebook or not to Facebook?

After Facebook crushed my heart, I asked PT to change my password and not tell me. I still wanted to remain on Facebook but I didnt want to have the opportunity to stalk my past person, his and our friends, and his new person. I couldn't watch his new life unfold before my eyes - a life at the time that I still wanted to be a part of. The most important part of my healing process came when I told PT to pull the plug, to delete my Facebook account completely. And it sure as hell felt good. I've been Facebook free for about 4 months or so, and it has been great.

But recently, I have been thinking about bringing it back.

I've lost touch with some friends and relatives, and I'm starting to think that maybe its hindering myself in entering the dating world. Guys I meet can't stalk me on Facebook. They can't find out if we have mutual friends, what people are writing on my way or even what crazy bumper sticker someone has given me. Hell, I dont even know what Facebook can tell you about people these days, but I'm sure its TMI.

I know this all sounds crazy, but I think guys are timid to approach a girl without first feeling a sense of comfort and an acceptance that is a girl is interested in you. Maybe Facebook does this for our generation. Maybe finding out information about a person before you ask them out is a comfort level we are all getting a bit too comfortable with. Isn't that what dating is all about? Discovering a person?

Writing this has helped me flesh things out and I think I've answered my own question - I'm not going to return Facebook anytime soon. But you can catch me at my blog or on Twitter (@fashionista0921)

But what do you think... Facebook or not?

(This post totally made me feel like SJP typing away abot relationships on her mac. WIN!)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

"...Thank you for bein' a friend..."

Dear PT readers -

I have a special guest post lined up for tomorrow, so I wanted to take the time to thank everyone today for reading my little slice of the interwebs. (It being Thanksgiving and all.)

I have alot to be thankful for this year - I'm employed, I'm loved, I'm healthy and most of all I have the support of amazing friends (invisible and visible, near and far...)

I hope you all have a nice day with your people tomorrow.

Stay tuned for Fashionista0921 's guest post tomorrow.

Love and hugs to you all,
PT

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

"I hear in my mind all of these words and it breaks my heart, breaks my heart..."

Here in Pittsburgh, we 'Burghers found out today that our mayor Luke Ravenstahl is separating from his wife.

He's 29.

They have a son who is one year old.

He and his wife were married for five years and were high school sweethearts.

It's been a rough year for relationships, it seems...

It makes me sad. And it makes me worry about the nature of our society.

And that's probably all I should say about this.

:-(

Sunday, November 22, 2009

"...meet me on the equinox, meet me halfway..."

Last night Jason and I went out to dinner at the Sharp Edge in Pittsburgh's East End.

Sharp Edge is this phenomenal bar/restaurant that has an overwhelming beer list full of beers I do not understand. I'm not a beer fan like Sara and Jason are. I'm more of a wino. But I do like Sharp Edge because it's *such* a foodie restaurant. Amazingly bizarre entrees and salads and soups grace their menu and I'm always drunk (being that I do drink a fancy beer or two and don't handle them well) and stuffed to the gills when the night is over.

But I digress.

We met up with a dozen or so of Jason's friends - the majority of whom have children. One of the couples has a little guy who is a little less than a year old and just unimaginably adorable. Adorable to the point where I can't help but reach for him whenever I see him.

I have yet to be able to hold him for longer than 30 seconds without him screaming bloody murder.

*le sigh*

A few years ago? Wouldn't have phased me. Recently? Makes my ovaries frown and pout.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

"...I just called to say I love you, I just called to say how much I care..."

Hello lovies!

Not too much going on here in my neck of the woods.


Last Saturday was my Ma's birthday. She turned 61!
How cute is she? And how amazing does she look? No one ever thinks she looks her age! Woohoo! Thanks for the good genes Ma!

We went out to dinner. Where we all drank alot of wine and ate alot of food.


Sara and our Dad always sit together when we go out for dinner and are always up to no good on their side of the table....
Look how cute and innocent they look.

We went back to Sara and mine's house (that grammar sounds awkward.... that can't be proper...) for birthday cake!
That Whole Foods does a good job! I mean... uh.... Peace Turkey TOTALLY baked and decorated that herself... right down to the chocolate plaque! ;-)

This weekend involved a trip to my parents' house for dinner on Saturday and then a lot of vegetating, as demonstrated so well by Pete...


And then Sunday, Jason and I went to the Steelers' game where we saw the Black and Gold pathetically lose to the damn BENGALS. Ugh.

But look at this fabulous picture of Jason with Heinz Field reflected in his sunnies...


:-D

Ok, that's all. Forgive my laziness with the photo-heavy/word-light post. But go ahead and admit it... you all love seeing personal pictures on your invisible friends' (TM Auntie Susan) blogs!

Friday, November 6, 2009

"...as I walked out on the streets of Loredo..."

So I went to Costco the other day (don't judge me - they have really good produce and meat and inexpensive kitty litter.) And I always feel like such a big girl going to places like that because it's such a parent-type thing to do.

So I'm walking through the store (warehouse, whatev) with my cart full of bulk kitty litter and paper towels and 10 pound bags of banana bunches and I saw this:


A display of horses big enough for a toddler to ride!

I immediately snapped a picture and sent it to Sara (who still asks for a pony every year for Christmas and was feeling blue about her recent breakup.)


I'm generally the type of gal who loves being a grown up and all of the lovely things that go with it - ordering a glass of wine with dinner, buying my own clothes, staying up late, eating cereal for dinner, having a committed relationship, etc etc.

But seeing that pony at Costco made me wistful. And it made me miss my parents (who I do get to see every couple of weeks, at least.) And it made me miss being a little girl.

And when I was sure none of the parent-types who were there at Costco with me were looking, I walked up to the pony and patted his head.


Sunday, November 1, 2009

"...I always looked in through your glasses but all I can see is the specter of me reflected..."

Being that I'm not a huge Halloween costume person and being that I am an optician, I contend that wearing weird glasses is a costume in and of itself (which is why I wear all the weird glasses I do in my everyday life - it's like playing dress up every day!)

At trick or treat last night, Jason and I wore funny glasses while we sat on my front porch to passed out candy.


The specs Jason sported are actually for sale in my store and I must say are actually very popular among the arty and hipster types. And I must say, he is wildly adorable in glasses - even though it kinda looks like he's missing an eyeball in that picture.

The kids all liked him. He got a combination of "It's Where's Waldo!" and "It's Harry Potter!" comments from the little ones.

I on the other hand managed to actually frighten a fair number of kiddles with my glasses...