"...I wish everyone was loved tonight..."

So Happy New Year everyone!

You know, I've never been a big New Year's Eve party person. I'm one of those rare few who goes into an introspective and emo mood on NYE instead of a woohoo party mood. This usually means I end the night in weepy, self-indulgent tears. Not tears of sadness, just tears from being over-wrought.

Jason and I are heading down to my parents' house tonight after I get off work for a quiet dinner at with them and Sara at The Grand Valley Inn, a sweet little family owned restaurant a few minutes from my parents' house. It's nothing fancy or pretentious. But what it lacks in granduer it makes up in delicious food and lovely wine selections. And it's kinda nice that on a night like tonight when dance clubs and chain resteraunts are packed to the gills, we can go to a place that's completely under the radar.

If you're a woohoo person - be careful tonight.

If you're a weepy emo - come, let's have a group hug.

Best wishes for a gentle, peaceful 2010 that's full of grace and love.

"...you pull me closer to love..."

Last year I got flatware from Jason for Christmas. He's so practical. And it was our first time exchanging gifts. And to be honest, the gifts I gave him weren't so hot either. So.

....

...this year...

....I got Jason a few goofy gifts and a glass-blowing workshop at the Pittsburgh Glass Center since he's fearless about learning new things and loves making things.

...he got me a box of plastic forks. To be a smart ass, you see.

And he also got me this ASS-KICKING Trek Woman Specific bike! It accommodates the HIPS and the BUTT and the narrower shoulders! It's lovely! And it's BLUE! And now I can pedal with him on the countless trails around Pittsburgh!


It was wrapped and everything under his cute little tree. I wish I had taken a picture of it wrapped with that big red bow.



w00t!

Christmas was fleeting as always but it was lovely and peaceful and filled me up with so much love because I got to spend three whole days with my family and Jason. That was the best gift of all.

(Oh please who am I kidding? The fancy bike was the best part. ;-D )

"... I cannot live, I can't breathe unless you do this with me..."

My parents met on a blind date set up by my dad's uncle who at the time happened to work with my mom.

Twenty-eight years later, they're still together and still hold hands and look at each other with goo-goo eyes.

Here's the thing fun part: They got married two weeks after their blind date. They went to Atlantic City and were married by a Justice of the Peace. They'd both been married before, both been cheated on and run-out on. And when they met each other, they just knew.

My mom's mom (Nana) was not convinced Mama PT knew what she was doing. Nana didn't understand what her preppy, Presbyterian, Evan-Piccone-suite-wearing-school-librarian-daughter saw in Papa PT - a rough and tough electrician who wore belt buckles and cowboy boots and sported permed hair (Hey, it was the late 80's ok?) and *gasp* was a Croat and Catholic!

So when Ma PT went to Nana to tell her that they were doing to Atlantic City on May 18th, 1981 to get married, Nana's response was "Oh no you're not."

They got married anyway. And eventually, Nana accepted Pa PT. Not when Sara was born a year later. Not when I was born a year after that. It wasn't until a decade later when Nana was sick and Papa PT drove her to dialysis three times a week that Nana finally loved my dad - and actually told him as much.

... This is all to say that it hasn't always been easy for Ma PT to accept Jason. In fact, for the majority of the first year we were together, my mom actively disliked him in much the same way Nana actively disliked my dad - without provocation or reason. She has gotten warmer with Jason and Jason knows he needs to work for it a bit too.

Last night, Ma PT and I were talking and randomly - in the middle of talking about Christmas cookies and the Christmas Day dinner menu - my mom said to me, "I don't know if you've noticed, but I've been more accepting of Jason. I'm not going to be to you how my mother was with me."

So we had a little cry about that and then we went back to talking about sugar cookies. Like you do.

"...Is this the way it's really going down..."

Today's post is a guest post by my favorite person, Fashionista0921.

Fashionista, whether she realizes it or not, is a such a feminist in how she has dealt with everything these past months. She turned inward. She became introspective. And she focused on herself instead of turning into one of those stark, raving mad "women scorned" that society wants and expects every woman to become after a breakup. For this, I bestow upon her an honorary doctorate in Feminist Theory from PT University. :-)

Enjoy!

*********************************************************


I recent article over at the New York Times over here got me thinking... to Facebook or not to Facebook?!

About 9 or so months ago, you all know by now that my person and I took a break. We had known each other for over two years and were officially dating for a year and seven months. Times got a bit tough and we decided to take a break, a break I thought I knew would end with us back together. But that didn't happen. While on Facebook one day, I discovered he was in a new relationship, which tore my soul and heart to pieces. How could the person I thought I wanted to spend forever with do this to me? Did the really happen to me?

As you from my previous posting on PT, this was one of the hardest and most rewarding times of my life. As much as I think no one should go through the feelings of heart break and self doubt as I went though, it really made me realize alot of things about myself. Through it all, I discovered how strong and amazing I am. I know now what I wish I would have realized then. Things aren't going to work out with this past relationship, but I now know what I want and what I diserve in a partner. I'm im terrified, excited, and freaked-out as hell to start dating again. But I'm mostly excited to see what's in store for me.

This all beings me to the question- To Facebook or not to Facebook?

After Facebook crushed my heart, I asked PT to change my password and not tell me. I still wanted to remain on Facebook but I didnt want to have the opportunity to stalk my past person, his and our friends, and his new person. I couldn't watch his new life unfold before my eyes - a life at the time that I still wanted to be a part of. The most important part of my healing process came when I told PT to pull the plug, to delete my Facebook account completely. And it sure as hell felt good. I've been Facebook free for about 4 months or so, and it has been great.

But recently, I have been thinking about bringing it back.

I've lost touch with some friends and relatives, and I'm starting to think that maybe its hindering myself in entering the dating world. Guys I meet can't stalk me on Facebook. They can't find out if we have mutual friends, what people are writing on my way or even what crazy bumper sticker someone has given me. Hell, I dont even know what Facebook can tell you about people these days, but I'm sure its TMI.

I know this all sounds crazy, but I think guys are timid to approach a girl without first feeling a sense of comfort and an acceptance that is a girl is interested in you. Maybe Facebook does this for our generation. Maybe finding out information about a person before you ask them out is a comfort level we are all getting a bit too comfortable with. Isn't that what dating is all about? Discovering a person?

Writing this has helped me flesh things out and I think I've answered my own question - I'm not going to return Facebook anytime soon. But you can catch me at my blog or on Twitter (@fashionista0921)

But what do you think... Facebook or not?

(This post totally made me feel like SJP typing away abot relationships on her mac. WIN!)

"...Thank you for bein' a friend..."

Dear PT readers -

I have a special guest post lined up for tomorrow, so I wanted to take the time to thank everyone today for reading my little slice of the interwebs. (It being Thanksgiving and all.)

I have alot to be thankful for this year - I'm employed, I'm loved, I'm healthy and most of all I have the support of amazing friends (invisible and visible, near and far...)

I hope you all have a nice day with your people tomorrow.

Stay tuned for Fashionista0921 's guest post tomorrow.

Love and hugs to you all,
PT

"I hear in my mind all of these words and it breaks my heart, breaks my heart..."

Here in Pittsburgh, we 'Burghers found out today that our mayor Luke Ravenstahl is separating from his wife.

He's 29.

They have a son who is one year old.

He and his wife were married for five years and were high school sweethearts.

It's been a rough year for relationships, it seems...

It makes me sad. And it makes me worry about the nature of our society.

And that's probably all I should say about this.

:-(

"...meet me on the equinox, meet me halfway..."

Last night Jason and I went out to dinner at the Sharp Edge in Pittsburgh's East End.

Sharp Edge is this phenomenal bar/restaurant that has an overwhelming beer list full of beers I do not understand. I'm not a beer fan like Sara and Jason are. I'm more of a wino. But I do like Sharp Edge because it's *such* a foodie restaurant. Amazingly bizarre entrees and salads and soups grace their menu and I'm always drunk (being that I do drink a fancy beer or two and don't handle them well) and stuffed to the gills when the night is over.

But I digress.

We met up with a dozen or so of Jason's friends - the majority of whom have children. One of the couples has a little guy who is a little less than a year old and just unimaginably adorable. Adorable to the point where I can't help but reach for him whenever I see him.

I have yet to be able to hold him for longer than 30 seconds without him screaming bloody murder.

*le sigh*

A few years ago? Wouldn't have phased me. Recently? Makes my ovaries frown and pout.